I’m 46 and I’m Okay
I’m 46 years old today, and I’m okay with that!
Last year I posted 4.5 things I’d learned in 45 years. So over the last year did I learn that thing I was only halfway to?
First let’s review:
Over 45 years (and now 46), I’ve learned…
I am loved
Living in freedom is the only way to live
I am blessed
I am called
You can go back to that post and read more about those statements. But then I added this one last year as well…
I’m OK…..not yet okay.*
*OK and okay can be used interchangeably to mean the same thing. I’m using the two letters vs four letters to show I’m halfway there with being fully O.K.A.Y. 😉
Here’s the deal. I’m learning and embracing that I’m okay just like I am. But it’s hard. It’s hard to embrace the OK on days you don’t feel so OK. On those days you feel like you’ve messed up terribly in your relationships. Or the days you forego honoring your body and over exercise or eat all the sweets.
Yes, I’ve learned I need to be okay with myself right here right now. But I’m not always okay with myself. Sometimes I’m just OK. We’re all a work in progress.
So what gives with this idea of being able to say I’m okay? And did I make progress with it over this last year?
To be sure, there’s a lot to say about positive mantras and affirmations.
I am enough.
I am beautiful.
I am perfect just as I am.
I love myself.
I am strong.
I am valuable.
I get all those statements and agree with them. In fact, I use some regularly. But I feel like sometimes we think we have to love everything about ourselves to be able to say I’m okay or I am enough.
My hang up has always been my body. I feel fat. I look fat. I’m not pretty enough. If I could just have a flat belly. Etc, etc.
Some time back I posted about not looking at my reflection in the mirror. The truth is, I know my body isn’t perfect. Does the perfect body even exist? We may look at someone else and think they have the perfect body, but I can pretty much guarantee that that person would disagree with us.
I have rolls and cellulite. Often it’s obvious that I don’t take a lot of time with hair and makeup. Clothes? Fashion? I wear what’s comfortable, but I know it’s not always the most flattering thing.
To be okay doesn't mean we are perfect. Sometimes we have to let go to be okay. #lifelessons #celebratinganotheryear Click To Tweet
I’m coming to a place where I acknowledge the imperfections. I don’t love them. But I can let that go and be okay with them. They just are. However, they don’t have to rule how I think or feel or act.
I may never embrace my poochy stomach. Sure, I’m grateful that my belly carried a baby and my body birthed a boy. But to tell you that I love my belly, or that I think I will ever say that I love it, I don’t know. I know today I’m not saying I love my belly. But I’m okay with it. My belly is. It just is.
Living a healthy lifestyle is about more than weight loss and body composition.
Although I’m all about ditching diet mindset, I still eat healthy(ish!), simply because I feel better when I do.
So over the last year, have I embraced OKAY? I think I’m getting closer to that. Why? How? Because I’m beginning to understand what it truly means. Actually, it’s not about our bodies at all.
The question needs to be, am I okay in my soul? And that has nothing to do with the physical body but everything to do with allowing Jesus to live fully in and through each one of us. That, my friend, is my heart’s desire. I imagine it’s yours too. Let’s pursue that as we move forward.
Cheers to another year!
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