How to Have a Bad Day Without Letting it Define You
What do you let define you? Is it the letters behind your name? Your successes? Your failures? What is the definition of you?
We all have a bad days. They’re a guarantee.
Humid weather = Bad hair.
Daylight Savings Time but someone (certainly the husband!) forgot to set the clock forward an hour = Running late all day.
Spring thunderstorm + Power failure = Fridge full of spoiled food.
PMS strikes = Bag of chocolates inhaled before you know what happened.
Enough already! I think you get the point. We all have bad days. They happen. It’s life. But it’s how we deal with them that determines the next day and the next time that same thing happens.
Let me share a story with you…..
Early trip to Target (my favorite place on earth!). Starbucks coffee (my favorite drink!). Beautiful sunny day. No traffic issues. Got home a little before noon. My plan was to make my shake as soon as I got in the door, because I was hungry. Well, I got involved in unloading, putting things away, and then I opened one container of trail mix (and I KNOW trail mix is not good for me, because I can’t stop at one serving!). And then I snacked on something else I got. Then I opened something else to try. And then I opened the Reese peanut butter footballs. (Because you have to have Reese peanut butter footballs for football season, right??) And an hour later, I’m regretting every bite of everything I had just had. And then the negative talk comes in. The feelings of guilt and remorse. Why did I do that? What kind of example am I? But, I shook the thoughts (for the moment), fixed my shake (because I knew I still needed that boost of nutrition), and I did fine the rest of the day…..with the eating…..
Then there was the evening.
I was out and about. I noticed EVERY person. Then, I began comparing bodies in my head. “I wish I looked like that.” “I bet she didn’t stuff her face with trail mix and chocolates today.” “Why can’t I get a grip?” Negative talk. Comparisons. Insecurities.
I made a few bad choices in the middle of one day. But I allowed that to take over my entire thought life. (Oh, and I won’t bore you with the small argument with my husband all because I was feeling bad about myself and took it out on him.)
It all went south after eating a bit too much trail mix. I could’ve righted the ship immediately after, but I didn’t. I indulged a couple more times, but then it seemed things were getting better. BUT, my mind, my self-discipline had been exhausted by the fight I had with myself that day, so I had nothing to fight off the negative thoughts later that day and then took it all out on my husband too.
Ugh! Day wasted. BUT, was it really? Here is where we can still take back control.
Yes, a lot of that day went south, but I learned some things. (And I doubt I need to mention that I learned not to bring trail mix into my house!)
That day didn’t have to define me. When I laid my head down on my pillow, I took inventory and determined the next day would be better. It was Friday, I could’ve said, “Heck it’s the weekend! Let’s just throw caution to the wind and start a diet of restriction on Monday.” Nope! I don’t operate like that anymore! I wasn’t going to sulk and feel sorry for myself or beat myself up. And, I wasn’t going to name myself as a loser or failure or quitter or fat or undisciplined.
The day just was. Now, what can I learn from it? I had to take some time to go back over the day and notice where I could make changes. It was not going to define me. I would let it REfine me. What could I learn and how could I handle things differently the next time?
And in the midst of all of it, trail mix and Reese footballs in hand, I was always a loved daughter of the King who didn’t look at me any differently than He did when I woke up that morning.
On the journey…
Always learning and growing…..
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